Current mood:	loved
Current music:	Lil Kim

This feeling has no meaning
I'm really not sure where to begin, maybe I should start with whats going wrong & then to things that are right. So that when I finish writting I can he happy, ya know.

So my sister is the biggest bitch in the world, she blacked mail me. She went through all my text & shit without telling me, she just took my phone with her to mexicali & decided to snoop. She read the text that ramon sends me that say "can i hit it or what?" Or the one where he says "woo! i'm already naked!" We just joke around about that kind of stuff, but she took it all serious. So she came to the conclusion that ramon & I are having sex. hahahaha, not even. But yeah so I asked her not to do it again cause it was rude, & then she said "oh, so thats how you're going to be well you can either be nice to me, or i'll tell mom" & honestly I don't care if she does, the only problem is that my mom would explode & do something emberassing. & I honestly couldn't handle that.

She told my dad, him & I discussed the issue of me having sex & yeah. He knows I have so much more self respect for myself then to just go fuckin someone i've barely been with. My dad trust me, & that is why I love him. He's the onyl one I can trust, & i'm the only one he can trust, it works out. When I get married, I hope my husband has qualities like my dad, respectful, hardworking, loving, trust-worthy, etc.

Yesterday I fasted so today would be the 2nd day I fast, i'm trying to keep it up till monday & maybe tuesday, or maybe even for more. If not then i'll go back to the 2-4-6-8 diet. I can't do that diet, its too hard to stay within 200 cals, & so on. Plus once I ate, I don't stop. Thursday night I binged, I think thats what led me to not eat yesterday.
Oh well day 2 better work out.


I've spent the past 2 days with ramon, & I have no complaints. I feel so tiny, warm, perfect when i'm in his arms. Sometimes we'll just lay on his bed, completely silent, in the dark, & our arms wrapped around each other & it is the most enjoyable feeling in the world. He told me to remember that the 24th is one month. I really do feel like its been forever, only 13 more days till 1 month. Ugh, no one knows how much I really do like him. He's everything, he's so sweet. I want to never leave him. never. SO I dunno. ayy I want to be with him everyday.


:D sd;fhsuebsjdbf